I need to get it out of my system..
Journal Entry: Mon Jun 30, 2008, 10:32 AM
Ok, life has become fairly ok I guess. Ive gotten a summer job, by dad is still retarded, my friend and boyfriend are nagging so yeah its peaceful -_-
Of course, I dont blame them for asking to make me come out, they are my friend and boyfriend after all, but we have one problem. I hate to og out, I feel uncomfortable to stay at anothers house and thats just how I am. I feel like an intruder in another persons house as well as a huge burden. Probably why I rarely eat unless Im forced to of course. I just cant find that peace to sit down calmly, smile and talk with others. Its not in my nature I guess. I love them both of course I do! But when she asks me every freaking time about this or that and Im not particulary in mood to answer so I just write one or two words. She keeps asking and it pisses me off. My mother noticed it as well when we were looking for a pair of new glasses to me. She was asking so many freaking questions she seemed to be my mother. She has always been like that, and yeah its ok to be curious. But shes overhand and Im sorry to really say it but I hate that side of her. Ive also got a health issue concerning my blood, Ive got no idea what the word is but its something like the blood being too thick so it blocks and it cant be healthy. Im going to the doctor to get some iinformation and some new pills because I cant use the others anymore. My one year anniversary with my boyfriend is soon up and I have no idea what to really do. I want to be with him, but I dont really like the movies so yeah
Anyone got any idea to help me? I just need to rant out everything that is inside of my head. Its a chaos because Im still mad at my father and Im just tired of them asking me nonstop to come out and meet.
I didnt get to see the horse show which sucks completely! I suddenly heard there were pure and quality horses, one was even owned by the sheik of Quatar and I freaking missed it! It pissed me off and my dad blamed me for not listening when I have the feeling he lied to me straight in the face. My boyfriend didnt make it easier when he reminded me of what I had missed so I got mad at him as well. I was working that day and seeing as I lost my cell phone I kind of need the money to get a new one. *sigh* I just want to run away again. I want to live with mom a while but I cant because theyll just yell at me again and Im so frustrated I start crying for nothing and I hate it! And the name of my brother didnt help that much but either way I dont really care. Ill call him junior or something>_>
So yeah, life is brilliant, Ive got some good news from meh friend that she has become better and it really calms me. Knowing she it healthy is important to me, well that any of my friends is healthy is important to me. But somehow I feel like her big sister or something even though she is older then meXP The others are a little jealous becaus ei have the habit of talking about one person for a little to long time. Dunno why just do and frankly, I wont try to make myself anything else, thats who I am and if no one can accept it, then fine by me. I wont make myself something Im not, the true personality of a person is the person one like. Yeah Im moody and I have the habit of snapping, that doesnt mean that Im mad or something. I dont know, it just makes me sad and depressed inside to hear it I guess. I know its true but why do I need to be something Im not? I just dont get it.
PS: I can't change the euphoric thingy so yeah...I'm not in that mood at all.
So there, done with ranting
Sorry to make you listen to it-_-
~Free out
- Mood:
Euphoric - Listening to: Blind - Lifehouse
- Playing: HorseIsle<3
Devious Comments
--
"Do you not know that, in the service, one must always choose the lesser of two weevils?" - Capt. Aubrey, Master and Commander
Most Heroes aren't.
--
They are the reason I'm not doing it.
I still sit in my room wanting to.
I hear their soothing voice.
So I lean back knowing I love them.
--
They are the reason I'm not doing it.
I still sit in my room wanting to.
I hear their soothing voice.
So I lean back knowing I love them.
acloudabovemybed
acloudabovemybed
--
They are the reason I'm not doing it.
I still sit in my room wanting to.
I hear their soothing voice.
So I lean back knowing I love them.
--
They are the reason I'm not doing it.
I still sit in my room wanting to.
I hear their soothing voice.
So I lean back knowing I love them.
--
They are the reason I'm not doing it.
I still sit in my room wanting to.
I hear their soothing voice.
So I lean back knowing I love them.
--
====
House:Everybody Lies
...
Sometimes the biggest mistakes,
can be the best damn thing
that ever happened to you
--
My art: [link]
--
[link] <-- Visit my art account!
--
They are the reason I'm not doing it.
I still sit in my room wanting to.
I hear their soothing voice.
So I lean back knowing I love them.
--
They are the reason I'm not doing it.
I still sit in my room wanting to.
I hear their soothing voice.
So I lean back knowing I love them.
=larfsalot
--
Everyone on this planet is different.
----------> That's one hell of a similarity.
___________________
Check out my Portfolio
--
[link] <-- Visit my art account!
--
They are the reason I'm not doing it.
I still sit in my room wanting to.
I hear their soothing voice.
So I lean back knowing I love them.
--
Please, check out my main account; [link]
--
They are the reason I'm not doing it.
I still sit in my room wanting to.
I hear their soothing voice.
So I lean back knowing I love them.
--
They are the reason I'm not doing it.
I still sit in my room wanting to.
I hear their soothing voice.
So I lean back knowing I love them.
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